


I'm In The Band

by whoneedsapublisher



Category: Original Work
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:55:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29669679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whoneedsapublisher/pseuds/whoneedsapublisher
Summary: Amber strikes out with one hell of a bad swing.
Kudos: 2





	I'm In The Band

"Well, then I mentioned I was in a band," I said.

Fred rolled his eyes. "Of course you did. You always say that."

"Look, it's true, right?" I said defensively. "And girls love when you play an instrument!"

"Really?" Fred asked skeptically.

"Yeah! Source: Me, I'm a girl, and people in bands are hot," I said, crossing my arms.

"Whatever." Fred leaned back in his chair and took a sip of his beer. "So how did you screw it up?"

"Who said I screwed it up?" I shot back.

"Source: me. You're here, talking to me, instead of kissing a girl," Fred said, pointing at me accusingly. He had a point.

"Fine, I admit it could have gone  _ better, _ ”  I said. “So, I mentioned I was in a band, and then…”

* * *

"Oh, you're in a band? What do you play?" she asked, her eyes sparkling, no doubt because she realized that the girl of her dreams was standing in front of her right that mo-

_ Go easy on the editorializing, Am. _

Look, fuck you, Fred, that's how she looked.

_ Whaaatever. _

Anyway, I did sort of like a casual hair slick back move, and it wasn't awkward  _ at all _ , like, it was completely natural, and I said

"Well, y’see, darlin’”

_ No you didn’t _ .

What?

_ That’s not what you said. _

Yes it is!

_ It’s really not. You’ve never said “darlin’” to a girl in your life, Am. _

Fine! Fine.

“Uh, well, um,” I actually said, like an idiot. “I-It’s sort of like a bass.”

_ What _ ?

Oh, it gets worse.

“Except like, um, not only four strings, and like, the strings aren’t really strings?” I said, stuttering. “I-It’s kinda like a keytar, but it has a stand, um, a- a keyboard! That’s the word!”

* * *

Fred looked at me flatly. “Wow,” he said.

“Yeah,” I said, sighing. “Yeah. I think that, uh, was probably where I lost her.”

“ Probably,” Fred said. “The fuck did you say it was like a  _ bass _ ?”

“It was the first instrument that popped into my head!” I said defensively. “Look, she was really pretty, okay? I got a little nervous.”

“A _little_ nervous,” Fred said sarcastically. “Hate to see what you’d do if got a _lot_ nervous. Probably end up in jail.”

“Shouldn’t you be more sympathetic?” I grumbled, taking a bottle from the cooler between us and taking out my keys. There was a bottle opener on the table, but I liked mine more. It was a little curled up dragon, and it looked totally badass. Girls love it. Probably. Look, I’m a girl, and I love it, so at least _one_ girl loves it. “You’re single too. And you have twice as many people to pick from!”

Fred rolled his eyes. “Unlike you, I have standards,” he said, taking a swig. “So no, I don’t have twice as many options as you just because men are also a possibility.”

“Hey! I have standards,” I protested, struggling to remove the surprisingly stubborn cap on the bottle of cheap domestic beer.

“What, pray tell, are these standards?” Fred said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

“W-Well…” I said. “They… have to be cute?”

“You think _every_ girl is cute.”

“I do not! I don’t think Miss Haversham is cute!”

Fred looked at me disbelievingly. “The fact that you’re resorting to our highschool math teacher who’s like sixty years older than you as your example of a not-cute girl pretty much says it all, Am.”

I sighed. “Alright, fine, so maybe I like a lot of girls. But not literally _every_ girl, okay?”

“Whatever,” Fred said, willing to let me maintain at least a shred of my dignity. “You still like more girls than I like guys and girls combined.”

“Well, see if I’m nice when you strike out with one of the rare lucky few, then!” I snapped, finally popping off the cap with one last violent jerk. It flew up and hit me in the face. “Ow.”

Fred just rolled his eyes again. “I’m here drinking with you, aren’t I?” he said.

“You’re being a jerk, though,” I grumbled.

“I’m being realistic, Am. You screwed up on this one, and you know it, so I’m not sure why you’d want me to pretend you didn’t.”

I slumped down in my chair and pouted. “I want you to tell me ‘you’ll get ‘em next time, tiger!’ or something.”

“You’ll get ‘em next time, tiger,” Fred said, stonefaced.

“Wow, thanks,” I said. “You’re _such_ a good friend.”

“Look, you don’t need a pep talk,” Fred said.

“I don’t?” I asked, confused.

“No. You don’t need a pep talk, and you don’t need to sit here getting drunk in your kitchen. What you need is to go out to the bars and find a girlfriend.”

“But-”

“No buts,” Fred said, crossing his arms. “I’ll come with you and bail you out if you do anything too stupid.”

“Really?” I asked, tears welling in my eyes. “You’re such a good friend.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Fred said, pulling out his chair and standing up. “Let’s go. Mary’s is still open.”

* * *

“So,” I said, leaning against the bar and smiling at Jennifer, who was just as cute as a button. “Did I mention I mention I was in a band?”

Girls love it when you’re in a band.


End file.
